Christmas wasn't as bad as I thought

Well I didn't eat half as much as I thought I would which was a plesant surprise :) and I only gain half a kilo which I'm also grateful for but I am still falling behind, I was hoping to be 57kg by now and I'm a giant 59kg

I don't enjoy this heat at the moment, it meant a bikini had to come out, and my thunder thighs do not appeal to me, and I have been so caught up on the my family reunion that I haven't done a lot of exercise in the last 4 days. They all left today so I can now finally go for a really long skate tonight and get back into my normal routine of two workouts a day and one small meal a day.

I think all my girlfriends are in the same frame of mind as me, with Bali creeping up very quickly I think everyone is doing everything possible to loose kg's however they are all a little less drastic as me, I am prepared to fast, run until I vomit and swim laps til I'm ready to drown. I think I can do it, this heat makes things easier coz I'm rarely hungry and all I want is watermelon and pineapples to keep me hydrated and fueled up for all my exercise.

Well I better quit typing and throw on my rollerblades and get back on me bike and start dropping this kgs
Love you all xx

So I joined Tumblr

Okay so I joined tumblr, not 100% sure what it is but I'm told its fun :) please add me if you have it and help me get inspired to post in photo's n stuff. My URL is australianana.tumblr.com

On to other news, the weight loss isn't going well... But being Christmas I expect that I won't loose a heap. My aim however is with the 2 weeks I have off from work that I want to loose 4kg so the plan is to run in the morning by myself, only eat lunch each day (how I'm going to avoid mealtime when I'm not working is going to be a challenge) and rollerblade with anthony at night. And I'm going to join the gym, one closer to work so I can go before and after work, I now just have to find one that won't cost me a fortune.

I am trying to get used to being hungry again, today at work I felt like I was going to vomit because I hadn't eaten in 24 hours (not a big fast but I gotta start somewhere) and regardless of the skinny person inside of my head telling me not to eat I ate some vegetarian dumplings and then some lamb and rocket salad for dinner, so a pretty healthy day but I need to consume less, I always need to consume less.

I'm loving my rollerblades, they are so much fun and I getting better at it, Lilly runs quite happily next to them which I was concerned about but she isn't fussed. I really I had the time this week to go some long distance skates but the family starts arriving from all over the country and I need to help mum clean the house, clean my car and generally just get organised for Christmas and concentrate on not eating myself stupid with all mums Christmas baking. The plan is to get up at 6am tomorrow and go for an epic long skate before work and then for a run with Anthony tomorrow night after my physiotherapy, as my right shoulder is giving me grief again :( I think the steroid injections I had in August to settle the pain are starting to wear off, and it ain't pretty to say the least...

Okay well I'm off to bed or i won't be able to get out of bed at 6am for that skate. Lots of love and please add me on Tumblr so I get some sort of benefit from it xx

Rollerblading my way to thin!!

I have been doing some research on exercise that is low impact but still fat burning for me to do on my off days when I'm not running, and after reading dozens of articles I have come to the realisation that in most aspects rollerblading (in-line skating) is better than running for weight loss and building stronger muscles, not to mention freakin fun!!

Throughout most my teenage years I used to rollerblade for miles to exercise my dog, and just because I enjoyed it, and I remember being so fit, lean long legs and better abs than most the boys my age (minus the guys that spent most their lunch times in the gym). So I am going back to my roots and putting my skates on, I just bought AU $100 skates from my fave sports store and need to buy some wrist guards next pay so that I don't break my wrist =P Anythony is being really supportive of this, because being 26cm taller than me, he can run a lot faster than me even at a jogging pace, so this allows him to go really hard while I'm on my skates and recover when I am running next to him. So here is for hoping, but all going to plan I will also train my dog Lilly to run next to them, and pray it doesn't end up like when I almost ran her over with my bike when she was about 12 weeks!!

My inspiration at the moment is my trip to Bali in March, where I'll be spending 2 weeks chilling in a bikini, and if I can't fit in my Ralph Lauren bikini I'm gonna throw a hissy fit, because its the only reason I bought it, coz I couldn't pull off the tinny bottoms where I live. I'm aiming to loose at least 20lb between now and then, and I think that is a pretty achievable goal. I really want to walk out of my bungalo and for my girlfriends to be like "holy shit! How does she do it?" in regards to bikini weather I have been lucky as its been surprisingly cold so I haven't had any excuse to be in a bikini in front of anyone, except at the pool when I'm swimming laps but the last thing people are looking at is my fat thighs (I hope).

I'm loving herbal tea at the moment, it fills me up so quickly!! and as a treat I'm loving jelly beans, although after 4 or 5 of them I feel ill because the ones from the chemist are sickly sweet. I'm eating many small meals at the moment to keep my metabolism going, my average day goes as follows:

Breakfast: Porridge with sultanas and apple w/ cup of tea (1tbs milk)
Lunch: Usually orange and passionfruit juice, or if I didn't get time for brekkie (usually work related) I have a chicken, avacado & tomato toastie
Dinner: Usually a small portion of whatever mum (or Anthony's mum) cooks me

Snacks through out the day are usually fruit, museli bars and nuts

I'm still struggling to cope mentally with all this, and I find myself very down in the dumps about my body, particulary trying to find things to wear when going out, which in result I don't go out much anymore because more often than not it ends up in tears about me feeling fat and having nothing that fits mein my wardrobe (I refuse to buy bigger clothes, as that is not only wasting money I don't have but inspiration to loose weight so all my amazing clothes fit again). I do have my good days, but most of them are spent freaking out about whether I'm going to ever be 50kg again or stuck at 59kg for the rest of my life...

Love all your posts, you guys make my journey that much easier

Something has to change

130lb - this figure makes me sick, physically sick!! I used to be 25lb lighter and now I am creeping back to where I started, all because I lost sight of what is important. I am going to be a bride in the next 2 years and I refuse to buy any gown that is larger than a size AUS 6!

My first change was to add this cool app to my Windows phone (coz I'm against iPhones coz every man and their dog has one) and it is a GPS tracker to see how far me and Anthony run, our average speed, maximum pace, lap counter (when we go to the track) and all other cool stuff. I used it walking with mum tonight and walked 6km in about 50mins which was good, mum is trying to loose weight, although she is only wanting to loose like 10-15lb and I'm looking to loose at least 20lb. I have a run tomorrow aiming for 10km as its my first day back running after the allergy season.

I have really enjoyed swimming lately while I haven't been able to go outside and run until I vomit. Its low impact but can be very intense, and a full body workout. My swim program usually involves swimming several laps at the pool normally and then a few more using the kickboard so my legs get a kick ass workout to help me run. I think I might buy myself for xmas a nice swimsuit to do laps in as I have been doing them in a bikini - not a good look when I dive into the pool n my bikini bottoms end up around my knees. I am looking forward to a run though, its a great opportunity for me and Anthony to have a chat and catch up on things as we are so crazy with work at the moment I feel that I never really get 'us time' :(

My next change is my diet, I have cut down a lot of my junk food intake (some low calorie treats sit in my desk draw for emergencies) but I am also cutting out most the meat of my diet and cutting back on dairy products and carbs. Giving up meat without anyone noticing will be interesting as I am well known for loving my lamb, but I am fighting hard to cut it back, but not as much as bread, I loooooove my bread, coming from a European family bread and pasta are a big part of my family dinners so to give it up will be a tough challenge but I'm trying to remain strong - except Thursday, all the family is home for lasange and I plan on kicking my own arse for it, but I am definitley having a piece of it!

I really need to get back into fasting, I havent done it in a while and I think getting back into the habbit of it at this time of year is going to be tough but I think I'm going to start with one day a week (I have chosen Wednesdays) I'm going to fast, and build up until I am fasting at least 3 days a week. This Wednesday should be easy if I go for a run and wear myself out, but next wednesday night is Kris Kringle with the girls and that involves drinks and nibbles so this could be interesting... But I am strong and I will be skinny

I think the last thing I need to change is my mind set... The hardest of them all, I think my serious conversation with Anthony the other night about us getting married really helped, it gives me something to aim for. And I would have thought that Christmas would help inspire me to loose the wieght quickly so the photos look good, but I really don't feel as motivated as I should. I might have to find some thinspo to put up around me so that I can get myself hyped up to get skinny! I think back on how skinny I looked at my 21st back in June (112lb) and that helps, but also a photo of my modelling buddy Courtney helps, she is TINY!! About 6cm taller than me and weighs almost 20lb less!! Those photos alone cold keep me going for months, and the fact that she is also getting married (before me I'm certain) makes me wanna loose the weight even more.

So I'm off to find some thinspo, some healthy lunch receipes and if anyone has some fasting tips for a not so little miss that needs to get back into the swing of it please let me know, I'm def needing it!!

I'm a living experiment

Well I have just made the cruel discovery that I am 60kg again, 6kg above what I was when I last checked in, which over 4 or 5 months isn't bad, but def isn't good, I will explain though, I have been very ill for over a month now with sinus infections, ear infections and now a flu, so I haven't been able to run, and being November in Australia it is now starting to get fucking hot, almost too hot for my body to run. This sinking feeling has caused me to go into panic mode, I have practically stopped eating, which is quite difficult when I have a boyfriend who all too aware of my history with Ana.

I have been experimenting on what works for me so that I can maintain my busy professional life in Human Resources, but also so I can get home and maintain my busy social calender, training regime and after all that try and find time to sleep. Pure glucose is something I'm working with, Jelly Beans to be exact, but not the ones that you get at any tuck shop, but the ones that diabetics use that you get at the chemist. My current experiment is eating just enough that I don't pass out from exhaustion and hunger, and enough to keep me functioning at work, but not enough that I can't burn them off. So far so good, until I tried running in the heat tonight, which ended with me under a tree with Anthony feeding me a chocolate n some Powerade coz I was white and not looking flash at all. So I'm now re-thinking me summer exercise, because I will not be able to walk let alone run when it will be up to 48 degrees celcius where I live. I am considering taking up swimming for a few months and see how that goes, who knows, all I know is that I have to go back to the drawing board.

I will also mention that I am a bit of a grinch, Christmas turns everyone into raging lunatics, I go knocked over at the plaza today but some miserable sod, she knocked all the stuff I had in my arms from doing the mail and picking up coffee for my work mates and another xmas pressie for Anthony (our first xmas together so I went a lil nuts) and she looked at me as if it was my fault and kept walking without helping me with anything that she had kocked on the floor. However I do like my current parking situation, because it's private (7 foot fence with a security code n key) I have been granted access to use it on weekends so that I don't have to spend an hour looking for a park, and its right across from Myer (where most my shopping is done).

So back to this weight dilemma

Most my clothes still fit me, but there are surely many that don't, which includes one very very nice Ralph Lauren bikini, and that kills me inside. I'm off to Bali in March and I swear if it means I don't eat a proper meal between now and then so I can fit in it well that would be fine with me. I am fortunate that I also have a weigh conscious boyfriend so we rarely eat bad food, the worst is the occassional pizza (both our favorite) but we then punish ourselves with sport, basketball, soccer, swimming, running, anything really that has us sweating like animals. I'm definitley not going anywhere near water on Christmas, I'll sit in the shade covered up like a fatty should be.

Well back to the drawing board for me, new diet, new exercise and hopefully the old skinny me will be back

Blogging Holiday - My Return

I have been gone 2 months to do some soul searching and so that I can concentrate on my weightloss journey, and it so worked!! so here are my current stats as of this morning:

Height: 171cm
HW 70kg
CW 54kg
GW 51kg
UGW 48kg

So my lifestyle has changed a fair bit, and I am improving everyday. My next big step was my return to the gym for the first time a few weeks ago after my car accident which was fantastic. I have a regime that seems to be working and I am dropping weight and people are definitly noticing even clients. this regime involves still physiotherapy 2 days a week but I'm no longer getting soft tissue therapy and spend it in the gym on their specialised equipment building strength & core training, I also spend 3 days a week in the gym for an hour spending 40 minutes doing cardio training and 20 minutes on strength and flexibility. I also walk for an hour everyday with my dogs. This combinatin has been successful but still healthy, I am toned, my skin is still glowing and fresh and my hair is soft and healthy.

My diet is also very different to what it was 2 months ago, with the following being a typical food intake for the day

Breakfast: porridge with brown sugar and a cup of tea
Lunch: Skinny Vanilla latte
Dinner: grilled meat (usually lamb or chicken) with steamed vegetables
Snacks: I have small lollies at my desk if I get a sugar low and white tea if I'm really hungry

My ability to hide this is getting better also because my mum sees that I am eating and that makes her happy. What she doesn't see is that I burn every single one of my calories and then some...

My figure is not what I want it to be as I am the curviest size 8 I know as I still have small curves and a bit of a butt. But I can be happy about that as the guy I fancy, and have been seeing for a couple of weeks loves it!! I am still this tiny little thing (Tiny Tiff is what he calls me) but I'm still curvy in my work skirts. I work with this guy, his name is Anthony and he sits across from me, we have been chatting for a couple of months and I finally worked up the courage to give him my number and it has been going well since.

As you can see, my life has changed but for the better, I am skinny, but still maintaing a lifestyle that can keep everyone else happy as well... And most importantly now that I have found my rythym I am ready to come back to blogging to share what knowledge I have and what I learn everyday

Much love, look forward to catching up on your blogs as well xx

I can't freakin believe

I have been binging like mad, and I'm still loosing weight... I am so shocked!!
I'm a comfortable size 8 and shrinking, I can feel my hip bones, collar bones and rib cage
My only flaw is that I am a tiny bit bloated...

Not sure of my weight, but I don't care about those figures as I am shrinking in cm's

Although my diet is very similar to what it was when I was 46kg, small pieces of candy when I feel dizzy, and cups of tea to keep me warm then a high protein dinner.

I had 3 people comment on my outfit today, as I wore a dress for the first time in ages, one of the ladies in admin said "OMG Tiffany you're so skinny, you have a beautiful body" and after the shit time I've had emotionally (hence the binging) it felt nice to be complimented, even though I felt a little gross with my belly, as my back is just shot of being strong enough to handle my crunches.

I think I have been loosing weight with all the stress, my job, family and friends are running me around in circles and well yeah, I am running on pure adrenaline, and caffeine.

Okay well I better run, one family commitment after the other.
xox